Stop Your Divorce?
Never, not even in your wildest dreams, did you imagine that one day you would be trying, rather desperately, to stop your divorce.
Your thoughts keep making that agonizing journey to the most memorable day of your life, your wedding. Here was a couple that was made for each other, that vowed to stay together at every stage of this beautiful relationship- as man and wife, as a doting and responsible father and a mother to their children and finally, as gracefully ageing grandparents.
But today, your spouse seems to have distanced himself from you and his family, and argues ad nauseam that separation is virtually unavoidable.
It certainly is a cause for concern. But you stand firm and refuse to support him in his intentions, and try to give this fledging marriage one last chance. It’s never too late to stop your divorce, remember.
As parents, don’t you owe your child this much, you ask?
Moreover, as a forward-thinking woman, you feel you have every right to know why you’re being penalized for no fault of yours. So you try every conceivable trick in the book to help bring that spark into your vapid existence.
From seeking not-so-cheap advice from matrimonial counseling experts and guidance from unintelligible eBooks to meditation and yoga, you still don’t seem to be free from the agony. You are still groping in the dark about how to stop a divorce.
Myths About Marriage
Okay, yours was a marriage that was enveloped in a rose-tinted cloud. It had all the trappings of love, passion, companionship and romance woven rather elaborately into it.
So if yours was a match made in heaven, where on earth did the how-do-I-stop-my-divorce thoughts come from?
Most marriages fall apart simply because they stagger under the burden of colossal expectations. The lack of communication and diminishing respect between partners acts as the trigger.
Niggling problems escalate into major arguments and all hell breaks loose. And before you even know it, you have fallen prey to the guiles of a nifty divorce lawyer.
If you feel divorce is the only way you can liberate yourself from the constraints of a claustrophobic relationship, then you are way off the mark.
In all cases, this extreme step only causes more agony and hurt. And the physical and mental trauma that your children go through is simply indescribable.
Time For Introspection
It might seem quaint, but before you decide to end that thorny relationship, it’s important to do some introspection. Here are some questions that you need to ask yourself very sincerely:
- Why are you trying so hard to save your marriage? Are your earnest efforts guided solely by the fear of loneliness and frustration, or is it something more deep-rooted? You must ascertain the real reason behind your actions.
- Are you being consumed by a feeling of guilt? Are you feeling responsible for the pain and anguish that you would be causing to your distraught partner? You must try to reason if your guilt is responsible for any change in your decision to take a divorce.
- Gauge the reaction from the other end: If your partner is supportive of your efforts of stalling the divorce proceedings, it certainly gives your initiative a much-needed shot in the arm. But if he/she seems to maintain a detached character, then you must try and understand the reason for the same. This will help you arrive at a more plausible solution to this contentious issue.
- What the future holds? Will your life be as gloomy or will things improve if you stop the divorce? Do you really want to spend the rest of your life with your spouse? The answers to these questions are vital in your attempt to patch things up.
- Act now: Once you have decided about your future course of action, it’s time to set the ball rolling. If you are convinced that seeking a divorce is inevitable, then you must achieve your aim with maturity and dignity. But if you feel that preventing a breakup deserves a full-on shot, then it’s time to pull out all the stops and stop your divorce.
Save Your Relationship With <Fill in the blank> So you are going to stop at nothing in an attempt to save your long-standing relationship. But while doing so, make sure you do not lose your self-respect.
Most people try to resurrect their failed marriage by begging or pleading. This, quite honestly, makes you look awful, and only inspires a feeling of pity. It will, on the contrary, push your disgruntled partner farther away.
Instead, do your bit with strength and confidence. Make the most of your time by indulging in constructive activities that give your morale a tremendous boost.
When your spouse sees you having a life of your own that’s devoid of his/her presence, his hostile attitude is sure to undergo a sea change.
And you would have managed to save your relationship rather admirably. Hopefully, you will live happily ever after.