Staying calm is one of the most challenging skills you can master. It’s especially difficult when in the midst of fixing a broken relationship. It’s really easy to start yelling and screaming because of our frustration and anger. However if you really want to learn how to fix a broken relationship, you must remain calm.
Staying Calm – The Art of Self Control.
After reading over “How to Fix a Broken Relationship” by Michael Gregory a few things dawned on me. Often times when we think of being calm, it means that we must relax, take a deep breath, speak in a soft tone etc. It’s true that most people exhibit those attributes of calmness, but the most important aspect of remaining calm is actually being calm. Pretending to be calm, is just that pretending. You can only fool yourself and your partner for so long, before your “calm” turns into a storm. To get to a place of calmness you have to do the work to get there. That means asking yourself the difficult questions and directing them at yourself. Thinking like a kid, about how & why you feel is critical.
Finding peace is the answer.
People often ask me what the secret is to fixing their relationship issues, and I say to them, the first step is in finding peace. After saying that, they reply, “I get it, but why doesn’t he just listen to me?” and thus completely missing the point. Peace isn’t something that just happens. It something that you have work towards from within. At the core of finding peace you have to be willing to dive into the depths of yourself. For most, this is an uncomfortable experience, the exact opposite of peace. Nevertheless, it’s required, because the more you understand about yourself, the more you will understand about your partner and how you should relate to them. Maybe you discover it’s time to part ways and let things remain broken. After careful thought, maybe you conclude introspection is what you need to mend your broken relationship. It all starts with you at the center doing the work to achieve peace and calm.
How to Fix a Broken Relationship
Now for the easy part. If you’ve done the work to reach a state of peace from within, you should have some answers on what you want and what your willing to give on. Some of you are probably scratching your heads at this point wondering, “What are the things I need to say? What are the things I need to do?” The truth is, no one knows better than you what you really want out of your relationship. People around can help you to figure it out, but ultimately you have to walk through the door. If you are feeling lost with just how to figure out what you need to do to walk through the door, we have licensed relationship experts that you can speak with. All you have to do is download Clarapy for either iOS or Android. It’s free chat to ask questions. Give it a shot, but remember you and you alone have to walk through that door.