How To Get Your Ex Back In 4 Secret Steps – Step 2

How To Get Your Ex Back In 4 Secret Steps – Step 2

Now that you are well-aware of core elements of how to get your ex back, it is now time to talk about secret art of transmuting negativity into positive energy. If you just jumped on to the second step, I’d strongly advise you to go back and go through the step 1. I understand you are in a hurry to have your ex in your arms but you have to work on this problem in a systematic way.

Hey, congratulations to make it so far as it has been shown that 90% of the people cannot even get past the first page. And if you are here, you are the top 10% of the people and this really outline the seriousness that you have to salvage your personal relationship with your ex.

Hang in there as I am going to share with you the following tricks on how to get your ex back by using my secret techniques to “Transform Your Ex Emotion.”


As you know, emotion is really a crazy thing in relationship, it can either make or break you and your loved ones if you know how to do it (I’ll explain how to do that in a minute, just hang on there). No matter what sort of emotions your ex is holding for you at the moment, you can use them to your advantage (yes, even hatred – if that’s the case with you).

Compare to various controversy theory, reigniting love and attraction all over again is not that hard as it claimed to be, in fact it is even easier when your ex is feeling the same intense emotions as you like anger, jealousy, frustrations and even sadness. As long as your mindset is right and determine to get back your ex, then there is a really good chance that you can work on your ex emotions to reignite the spark once again.

Transform Your Ex Emotions #1:

Accept the problem to begin solving it (how to get your ex back)

81867588-253x300The first step to master the art of transforming your ex emotions is to first accept the problem. Something went wrong in your relationship and that’s the reason why you two are no longer with each-other right now (Simple as that). Denying the problem now and it will almost certainly blow up on your face few days later (believe me it does). If you are a man trying to get back your woman back into your arms again, then recognizing and acknowledging her emotions is the first most important step that you should do. Only after you recognize certain negative emotion (at both ends), you can start transforming it to positive emotions of love, gratitude, respect, attraction and closeness. You can mess up quickly if you don’t do that!

The much needed transformation in emotions takes place when you use what I called it as “Emotion Triggers”. These emotion triggers are the tiny bits and pieces of the relationship, emotions and stories that you two lovingly shared in the past. These triggers will later become the most important part of your communication with your ex via simple text messages (Yes, you hear me correctly, it is using your phone to send text messages. Who says getting back your ex needs to be a complicated process?).

It takes a little careful planning and you can take your ex to a desired emotional level without any difficulty.  That’s how you can make your ex focus on your positive aspects and bring them back to your side all over again.

Transform Your Ex Emotions #2:

Discover positive aspects of your relationship (another important aspect on how to get your ex back)

83146314-300x225Alright, you know it already (Subconsciously, everyone does). But you need to take it out from the back of your head to use it to your advantage now! If you don’t do that, your texts messages will not perform the way you want them to. It will take time but you must not plan on using some shortcuts here. Every relationship has certain positive triggers that are responsible to start your relationship at the first place. In fact, these triggers are what bring two people together, make them fall in love and start a meaningful relationship. It happens with everyone.

These positive emotions triggers were the ones that make you think that he or she is the one for you for your entire life. Now you need to discover these positive emotion triggers one by one by reminiscing some of the wonderful time you have had with your ex (I suggest you use a pen to jot down all the points as you are thinking through now). This may take some time so please take this time to think through this properly before you even you proceed to the next step that I am going to highlight. A good place to start is to think of all the good times you two shared when your relationship blossomed.

Some of the most common topics that glue two people together in a relationship (or kick-start it) include music, religion, passions, books, sex and kids. Your relationship may have some new topics as well. Try to go as deep as possible to discover positive aspects that can really click when you use text messages to communicate with your ex and drive him or her back to your arms.

It is important that you focus on all possible categories to figure out as many positives emotions triggers as possible. For example, if you start with music, you can list the kind of music you both enjoyed together. Or, it can be the track that both of you remember so well because it made you kiss each other on a lovely morning. It’s easy to find these positive aspects once you get started. Sex and passion are two topics that are no doubt important. These two topics can help you to rekindle positive emotions very quickly (Yes, that’s true. Every couple has had unique stories).

You don’t have to look for shortcuts when finding positive emotions triggers of your relationships. This method will work best when you try to be exhaustive in all your efforts.  What do I mean here? For example, if it’s about kids, you shouldn’t stop just there. You need to figure out some commonalities between you and your ex regarding kids that can bring you together. In most cases, these are little things that matter the most. If there is something about kids that you both love and enjoy from your hearts, it can be a great ‘positive emotions triggers’ that you can use. In any case, try to be completely honest when listing these positive aspects. Don’t make any guesses – there is no room for that right now.

Transform Your Ex Emotions #3:

Discover positive experiences that you had with your ex

108189808-300x208Now that you are well aware of what glued you together as a couple, you need to list all positive experiences that you made relationship special and memorable (So much that you are willing to create a more passionate, loving, and higher enthusiastic commitment in a  relationship now).

These experiences are generally the ones that stay in the back of your head almost forever and make you smile as soon as you remember them (although you’d have to spend some time to recalling all of them, but i can assure you that this is well worth it). If everything works out well (it WILL if you follow the step by step approach seriously), you’d be telling these positive experiences as bedtime stories to your grandkids few decades down the line! I’m sure you now understand what sort of experiences I’m referring to. You don’t have to be in a hurry when spotting these positive experiences when going back in the memory-lane. I have listed some of the examples that you can start thinking of below:

How you got together: This experience is no doubt highly valuable for both of you. If you are holding such an experience close to your heart, your ex is almost certainly doing the same. When two people get together, they feel an intense love and attraction towards each other. That’s one positive story that you can use a trigger.

When you were a team: If you go down the memory-lane, you’ll certainly find some occasions when you and your ex were a good team. For example, you two might have stuck together like one soul when your relatives or close friends opposed something either one of you approved of.

How you faced some challenges: Challenges and difficult time bring people together. If there have been times when you and your ex went through a challenging situation together, it can make a wonderful positive story. Difficult times usually bring people together and now you can depend on these great memories and start using the emotion trigger to get your ex back.

When you two finally accepted each other: It may include the day or night you two first accepted each other completely. You can also think of the occasion when you proposed to your ex (or the other way round).

These are just some of the common indicators that you can use to discover positive stories that connect you and your ex. From positive and memorable sexual experiences to boring activities that you two loved, you can also think of some adventurous activities you shared in the past. Just make sure that you do not choose anything that annoyed or displeased your ex in the past. Only positive experiences qualify as triggers that you can use to transform your ex’s emotions by using the texting strategies that I am going to explain in step 3. So hang on there, ok?

Transform Your Ex Emotions #4:

Analyze how your ex might be feeling at the moment

81867590-214x300This is important because you have to work on these emotions. In most cases, your ex might be experiencing some kinds of conflicting emotions. For example, it can be a mixture of self-righteousness and anger. If your relationship came to an abrupt break-up, it can be a little hard to figure out the emotions. In this case, you can ask some your common friends or relatives to learn about the exact reason behind the break-up. That’ll be of great help in learning about the kind of feelings your ex has for you at the moment.


Now that you can see, the things that I shared above are not trivial stuffs that you should avoid. In fact, if anyone of you is reading step 2 before step 1. Then I urge you to read the step 1 again before you proceed onward.

Click here to read about step 1 – The Core Elements of a relationship

Now that you have covered the core elements of a relationship and techniques to transform your ex emotions, you are now ready to move on to step 3 which is “My Secret Techniques on how to get your ex back part 3”.


How To Get Your Ex Back In 4 Secret Steps

How To Get Your Ex Back In 4 Secret Steps

Transform Your Ex Emotions – Step 2

Text Your Ex Back – Step 3

Are you feeling lost, depressed and hurt from a break up?
“It is all over now!”
“Move on with your life”
“You can always find another one who loves you even more!”.

Does that sound familiar?

What if I tell you there is a way to not only save your current relationship but perfects it with no more fights, argument, disagreement, jealousy, lies and even cheats?

Does that sound too good to be true?

I know this might sound crazy or even insane, but I am not B.S you here. It has been shown that the success rate of getting back your ex can be as high as 85.6%

The success rate for how to get your ex back.
The success rate for how to get your ex back.

So do you want to save your relationship today and start getting back the kind of love, passion and enthusiastic commitment that you have always been dreaming of? Then, you need to be calm, focused and have a concrete plan.

how to get your ex back
how to get your ex back

Make sure you read through the 4 key important steps before you decide what to do next to get back your ex!

Before I move on further, I like to introduce myself, my name is John.

5 years ago, my life came to a sudden standstill. My girlfriend and I had some heated discussions and we decided to part our ways. Well, we didn’t exactly make a decision – it just happened. At that time, the only thing that occurred to me was to run away from her as fast as possible (to a bar or a lonely hiding). Later, I came to know that she’d felt almost the same way! It took me 8 long months to realize that I wanted her back in my life. This feeling of emptiness was very strong and I was slowly drifting into an ocean of grief. It was affecting my work, behavior and social relationships to an extent that I thought my life would never be the same again.

I even went on to meet a psychiatrist to possibly know whether the idea of wanting my ex back was an insane one! (It was useless, as I figured out later).  I talked to people, read tonnes of blogs on the internet, went out in search of a possible ‘replacement’ for her that could soothe my heart and finally turned to my own self for answers – yes, I wanted her back!!

Today, my girlfriend and I share what I call a ‘perfect relationship’ with each other. About 4 years ago, I set out to make our relationship work all over again in a new and better avatar, and succeeded. By the time I made it happen, I had unraveled some of the most amazing secrets of getting an old and rugged relationship back on track all over again. That’s when I began to correct my mindset and work towards in getting my loved back again to my life.’

I know you must be getting bored but hang on there as I am now going to discuss the 3 main steps on how to get your ex back today. It doesn’t matter if you are a man or woman looking to have a positive and fulfilling relationship with your ex. This guide will definitely work great as long as you honestly follow the step by step approach that I have planned for you.

how to get your ex back damage control
how to get your ex back damage control

Ok, you might be thinking, John, I know this stuff, it is just going to be same old things that I have read in other blogs.

But I can assure you this is something that you have not heard about and by applying these 4 little known secrets, you are not only going to get back the relationship that you have always wanted to be but also the passion and enthusiastic commitment by your partner.

Step #1
Step #1 Your Past Relationship is Dead
Brand new start to get your ex back
Brand New Start to Get Your Ex Back

First of all, you should come face to face with what happened in the past. You don’t want your relationship to get back to same old state of dilemma all over again, do you? I’m not asking you to leave the dead past behind so that you can just move ahead. That’s not easy, I know. Had it been so, you wouldn’t be longing to have him or her back in your life all over again in the first place! You just need to accept the fact that the past is over. Period.

Now you just need to take home useful lessons from this ‘past’ (no matter how painful) and use them to your advantage – use these lessons to create a better and more fulfilling relationship with your ex now.

Next, you need to outline your future goals. These goals will direct all your efforts (I will tell you how) to have him or her back in your life. Before you move on to the part where you ‘do something,’ you need to know and fully understand 5 core elements (It’s easy – and the key here is to stay honest to yourself). A clear understanding of these core elements will set your mindset right (literally)! It’s not easy for everyone to digest these concepts without few hiccups because many of them are way different from what psychologists, relationship experts and others tell people.

How To Get Your Ex Back Core Element 1: 

You have to create a NEW and MORE FULFILLING relationship. 

A man trying to get his ex back
A man trying to get his ex back

Do not let yourself believe that you want to get back your ‘old relationship’ once again. Okay you came here looking for ways to get your ex back but that relationship ended few hours (or months) ago, remember? So you should really accept (and celebrate) the fact that your old relationship does not really exist anymore (that’s the truth, really)! It may sound painful (I felt that once) and brutal on my part to say so but this is actually the way forward to your goalpost (Getting your ex back). Only when you get over your ‘old relationship’ by mourning, partying or sobbing in your balcony, you can finally begin to do everything it takes to CREATE a newer and more awesome relationship with your ex!

How To Get Your Ex Back Core Element 2:

Forgive your ex and forgive yourself.

Forgiveness is the way to get your ex back.
Forgiveness is the way to get your ex back.

Holding grudges is not going to help you at all. Whether it was your ex who came pouncing upon you for a petty reason or it was you who hurt him or her in the past, you need to understand that forgiveness is a great power that can help you perform magic. We make mistakes due to misunderstandings, emotional outbursts and dozens of other reasons in our day to life. If someone made a mistake in the past (you or your ex), it does not mean the same trend would go on forever! Also, it doesn’t mean that you should hold on to that garbage (that’s what grudges really are) and miss all opportunities to make everything great, wonderful and worth-living. You need to recognize the fact that it is in human nature to make mistakes and subsequently learn to improvise. Forgive yourself and forgive your ex to bring yourself to a real high energy level.

Next, you need to work on your self-esteem. Trust me, a break-up (even if it happened 10 years ago) or a failed relationship can sometimes make a person’s self-image hit the rock bottom and stay there for a very long time. This is usually the case when you are filled with regret, self-loathing and lack self-esteem. When miniscule amounts of essential personality traits like self-esteem are left, you cannot expect to make your ex fall in love with you all over again. Or can you? So, you need to work on your own self-image for a while. Be vocal about all your positives, write them down like a creative writer, take a print out and paste them in front of your study table! (Yes, that will help) The point is to focus on everything good and great about oneself. Don’t worry; it won’t turn you into an egoist or an arrogant person. You just need to start liking yourself. The best way to do that is to feed your subconscious mind with dozens of positives about yourself that were long forgotten due to relationship problems. Only when you mentally like and appreciate yourself, you can expect your ex to like, appreciate and love you as well.

How To Get Your Ex Back Core Element 3:

Work on your ‘game while you are ‘single.’ 

Have a strategy to get your ex back
Have a strategy to get your ex back

This may sound a little insane (I know, it does) but you must go out, meet other singles and date when you have a chance. This is in fact one of the best techniques to have your ex notice you. And mind you, I don’t mean you sleep with dozens or get yourself into something serious. Keep it light, and fun.

In the process, you’ll not only raise your all-time-low self-esteem to a new level but also learn to appreciate all good things that happened between you and your ex. You’ll also present yourself as an interesting and attractive person to the world by doing so. When people around you begin to notice you, there is no reason why your ex wouldn’t do that. Being confident and happy is the important part of the ‘how to get your ex back’ approach.

How To Get your Ex Back Core Element 4: 

Don’t be needy!

Don't be needy!
Don’t be needy!

Alright, this may sound a little tricky as all you were looking for was just to get back your ex. This is especially hard when pain waves are gushing down your spinal cord every few minutes as you regret the last heated discussion you had, the differences you two didn’t try to fix on time and so on. Like we talked in the previous paragraphs, get over the past because you are now going to create a brand new, wonderful relationship with your ex. It is now time to raise your self-esteem, forgive anyone (including yourself). Do not let yourself believe that you NEED your ex! This can only bring your confidence level down when your rejects you because they generally dislike needy actions.

How To Get Your Ex Back Core Element 5:

Wait; don’t rush in! 

Don't rush to get your ex back.
Don’t rush to get your ex back.

If you are serious to patch up with your ex, then you need to wait before you start approaching your ex. But how long is that going to be? It really depends on the situation of your relationship but generally you should wait at least for a month for them to calm down their anger, frustrations and emotions. And during this “cool-down” period, please do not send any messages, emails, cards or anything else! Yes, I know it’s hard when all you can think of is the face of the man or woman you love. But you need to understand that going close before letting the smoke settle down is plain stupid. It can only make things worse. Instead, you need to start working on things that can help you get your ex back after one month.

Don’t worry if you’ve already made some of the core mistakes. These are very common mistakes that I made too when my ex left me. All I need you to do is to start working on the core elements that I have mentioned and don’t repeat it any more mistakes. If required, just jot down some of the core elements points that I have discussed.  If need be; print this page out and keep it with you all the time so you don’t do any of these mistake again.

Now that we have covered the core elements of how to get your ex back, we can now move forward to the next step: Transform Your Ex Emotions – Step 2”.