Rebound Relationships & Said Cliché

Rebound Relationships. Is This Basketball?

What are rebound relationships? What does being on the rebound mean? It means that you are fresh out of a relationship that just ended and that you may be desperate to have another one to replace the one you just lost. When it comes to marriage it means you just got separated and are possibly thinking of divorce.

Whether married or divorced rebound relationships are to be avoided! There is no way that anyone is ready for another relationship when they just got out of one.

For one thing you will bring baggage with you. This does not work for any length of time. You may be able to fake it for a little while, but it will resurface in the next relationship if not dealt with and this pattern will continue forever if you allow it.

Another problem is that you can transfer feelings for one person to another. Then you feel as though you love a person you just met and this isn’t possible,  at least not in reality.

The best thing to do is not get into rebound relationships at all. You do this by focusing on what you need to do to make yourself available for a healthy relationship. Focus on YOU! Not the ex or a new love interest.

You may need to chat with a counselor or join a 12 step group like Codependents Anonymous that will help you to stop old behaviors and patterns that are not healthy.

It’s also a good idea to stay busy with career, hobbies, friends, health or anything that is productive and prepares you for a better future.

If you’re married, but separated the last thing you need is a rebound relationship. Do what is mentioned above then maybe after you have gotten your life in order you will be an asset to the marriage and can work things out with your spouse.

Most people want a marriage to work out. After all, no matter who you marry there will be differences, maybe not the same ones, but you will have to deal with something.

Therefore, since you’ve committed time and effort into the one you’re in why not work on it? In other words, work on the one you have instead of starting all over again.

To summarize, forget rebound relationships they are a huge mistake and a waste of time if you are actually trying to salvage your relationship or marriage.


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Worrying Yourself To Failure With Women

Don’t Worry, Talk To Women

“If you spend too much time thinking about a thing, you’ll never get it done.” – Bruce Lee

Now let’s explore the mystic arts of having fun when talking to women. We will start off with some self evaluation on your social skills.

“Do you ever sometimes feel like you don’t know what to say next? “

“Do you ever worry about when to say what you want to say?”

“Do you ever wonder how to say what you want to say?”

Well let me tell you a secret… there is no definite answer to any of these questions, however, as you know fear and anxiety associated with these questions is very real.

So since there is no answer to any of these questions, then how do you hold a fun and free flowing conversation without trying to answering the above questions first?

And in that case, how do you avoid the fear and anxiety associated with the inability to hold fun and meaningful conversation with women?

“Don’t Think Too Much”

The very fact that you have tried to answer the above questions betray a nervous mindset to conversations… and this mindset needs to be avoided like a plague.

The simple truth is that if you are asking yourself these questions then you are probably thinking too much!

Let me explain…

Fun conversation flows from subject to subject like the ebb and flow of a wave.

The simple truth of the matter is that the mindset associated with the “what do I say next?” thinking is a nervous mindset. And this is exactly what you need to rid yourself if you want to be able to have fun when talking to women.

So how do you do that? Gain some Self Confidence!

Self confidence allows you to overcome your shyness in conversation and finally rid yourself of annoying questions cycling through your brain…

Questions that make you nervous…

Questions that make you try to hard to keep the conversation going…

Questions that you need to avoid so that you can finally be able to start having fun as you talk with women.

So can confidence alone really do all that?

Yes! Because a confident nature relieves the pressure you put on yourself and allows you to relax.

And this relaxed attitude in necessary if you are to be witty, funny and interesting when talking to women.

Confidence alone won’t hold the conversation together but it definitely creates the perfect mental attitude for great conversation. Think of confidence as the foundation to all fun and meaningful conversation with women.


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Girlfriend Doesn’t Want To Have Sex?

Girlfriend No Longer Wants Sex

Girlfriend Doesn't Want To Have Sex?
Girlfriend Doesn’t Want To Have Sex?

Differences in desire are one of the biggest issues in a relationship. Most relationships start off with infatuation. You have a LOT of sex and you can’t get your hands off each other. Sex is intense and often more than once a day. You are really in love.

Unfortunately, this state only lasts up to 6 months or so. Sooner or later, you come out of the high and see your partner for who they really are, not your fantasy. Infatuation is really like a drug high, nice while it lasts but the body can’t maintain the hormonal biochemistry for ever. (what a pity!)

Now you are in a relationship that is different and the rules change. Real communication is now much more important to sort out an issues. Talking about differences in sex desires is one of the more difficult areas to do but is essential if you have this issue.

Girlfriend No Longer Wants Sex Tip 1

If you woman does not want sex it could be that you lack good sex skills. Most women love foreplay but most men rush. Spend at least 30 minutes in foreplay and really enjoy it. Learn to lover touching your lovers body and really be in your hands when you touch, blow, kiss her all over.

Touch all parts of her body, not just the hot zones. The toes and fingers can be very erotic. Blowing over her body can be a real turn on.

Girlfriend No Longer Wants Sex Tip 2

Eye contact in sex leads to a deeper connection and most lovers hid from each other. Try breathing together for a few minutes. One of the keys if your girlfriend does not want sex is to feel each other more.

Take your time in intercourse and do not rush. Learn to control when you come so you can make love for hours. Most women do not like the porn style of sex as it lacks connection. I suggest to purchase Schnarches book called Intimacy and Desire to explore this topic in depth. This is a great book that will change your life.

Want to learn more about sex related topics?   Check out our section on sexual dysfunction in relationships.


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Dealing With Controlling Relationships

Controlling Relationships And How To Handle Them

The worse thing in the world is to feel controlled and manipulated. Each waking day, our minds are challenged by forces that try to identify and dictates to us what we need to do. Whether we know it or not, the forces of manipulation and control are always at work even before we get out of bed in the morning.

As soon as we turn on the morning show to watch a little T.V. before we go to work, we are always dealing with control. There will always be influences that try to get you to give up a piece if your mental sovereignty. It’s like the famous saying… “A mind is a terrible thing to waste!” The issue and elements of control and domination is an element of life that people battle with on a daily basis.

Nothing is more challenging than putting up with people who have power and control issues. This is one of the mysteries of life, which is, how does this kind of behavior exist in human beings and how can this behavior be corrected to advance the world into better relationships between countries, families, friends and strangers. The answer is not an easy one.

Controlling behavior and people kill relationships and can actually cause angst and anxiety. Here in America, it can also be linked to status and social problems.

People who are controlling are actually fearful and scared. To them, it’s easier to go the route of controlling people instead of dealing with people from a level of self respect and dignity. To them, having a controlling attitude saves energy and time. These people have visions of acting like an all powerful God with an overruling dominance over the lives of others. Life, to them is no sweat when giving the commands rather than receiving them.

“People who are controlling are actually fearful and scared.”

Gangs such as the Crips and the Bloods use the art of psychological control to intimidate weaker members of the gang and enemies of the gang. Controlling people violates the moral code of others without any respect to their human nature yet people allow them to continue to control.

Most of us are controlled on a subliminal level. There are mechanisms that were created to separate you from your money (loud television ads), national gossip magazines and journals (junk food for the mind) and other things that invade your peace of being. The result is a reaction to being controlled with trying to become controlling in our own lives. The result is negative.

All emotional and verbal abuse is looking for an element to control. It’s like a negative energy attaching itself to a positive energy only in a controlling atmosphere; it drains the life out of you. All people want the edge in life and they will use control and manipulation to get what they want. We’ve been taught materialism and capitalism promotes status. How wrong we are!

Behavior that attempts to control you – regardless of the intensity – breaches your emotional borders and becomes abuse.

Being used or using others in this level of abuse is more than the obvious problems. Bullying takes effect when someone is called a name or made fun of. It also is part of things such as temper tantrums. On more obvious levels, this abuse can be seen in forms of physical violence that is used to intimidate others. Intimidation and bullying can even take place at higher levels, where individuals will use their status to place themselves above others. Despite what many have come to believe, control and abuse have become a part of culture on several levels.

Subtle controllers, subtle manipulators
Emotionally mature people raise children with respect for the lives of others, dignity, self worth while making others around them feel comfortable. These people do not show their children how to hate, intimidate and control others that are different from them or others that they might want to use as a crutch for their emotions.

Subtle controllers can be the worst because they basically don’t talk at all but you can see their disposition in their actions towards people or another person. These are the individuals that you never want to go to help for because they will hold it over you for 100 years or more and they will, in essence, try to control their relationship with you via money and materialism.

These types of people seem to be okay on the outside but on the inside of their heart, they are full of deceit and lying. Their type of behavior comes on display after the light is turned on in your mind and sometimes our minds are sending us messages that we fail to listen to.

A relationship or friendship with a controller is always unhealthy and will take eventually, lead to the person being controlled, seeking counseling for their problem. When you feel off balance and that you don’t have the freedom to be you or feel that something is rotten in Denmark, then it’s time to check and getting rid of situations that are fully of trouble and contempt.

Self Check Analysis – What goes around comes around
Sometimes, we can be controlling and not know it. If you do have that problem, consider these things:

  • Am I sincere in what I’m thinking or doing?
  • Am I trying to hold someone hostage?
  • Am I being prejudiced?
  • Do I hate the person for no reason at all?

You know what goes around, comes around. I am a firm believer in Universal Law and karma. The karma will follow you like a wet blanket until you realize that you have to be baptized into all truth. This truth is the truth about ourselves. Once we are baptized into the higher knowledge of divine knowledge of the soul, then a person has a chance to learn and grow within themselves.

Protecting Yourself from Controlling Behavior

The damage of being controlled even once by someone will persist as long as you remain in the presence is having active communication with the person. Even if the person has perceived to be changed, they could pretty much be the same lame person that they were before and even lamer this time around!

Keep yourself free from these people and you’ll see your environment and health improve.


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Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back Tips To Live By

Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back

So you’ve just received the dreaded ‘Dear John’ text from your girlfriend telling you it’s all over.  You can hardly believe what you are reading, even though you’ve read it for the umpteenth time.  Your first instinctive action would be to call her and plead with her to come back.  Your friends tell you to get down on your knees and tell her you’re sorry and promise that you will change.  But some other friends tell you to let her go and start anew.  You’re all confused, your heart’s beating as fast as a freight train, you’re nervous and don’t know what to do.  You start to panic. How do you get your ex girlfriend back?

Stop, before you do something you’ll really regret later.  As difficult to believe as it may seem, both sets of your friends have got it wrong. The thing to do is not rush over and talk to her, beg her to come back or confess your love for her. Neither should you forget about her and start anew immediately.  You might find yourself in another relationship on the rebound and lose any chance of getting back your ex-girlfriend.

The first thing you should do is to agree with your ex-girlfriend about the breakup.  Whatever differences you two may have, the best thing to do now is to either come to some compromise or if that is not possible, at least agree to disagree and remain friends while you take a break from each other.  You may be full of regret and want to patch things up so that you can get back together immediately, but if you act on impulse, you’ll most probably drive your ex-girlfriend even further away.  So take some time now to pull yourself together, take a step back and evaluate things.

When you are apart from each other, take steps to put in some necessary changes in yourself.  At the same time, don’t wallow in self pity.  Use this freedom you now have to make some new friends, but don’t start any serious relationship with anyone else as it will only be out of a rebound.  Give yourself at least a few weeks apart from your ex-girlfriend before contacting her again.  In the meantime, think through what went wrong and what you did to contribute to it.  Do not focus on her wrongs, just on your own.  The first step in getting back your ex-girlfriend is to change yourself.

When the time is right, you can take steps to meet up with your ex-girlfriend again.  If she’s not up to it, don’t force her.  You can try again at a more opportune time.  If she’s hesitant about meeting up, just assure her you only want to talk as friends. Make the occasion casual and fun.  Remember when you first started dating?  Be that man again, only better.  Give your ex-girlfriend what every woman wants – security.  Show her that you’re willing to make whatever adjustments in yourself so that she’ll always feel secure.  When you can convince her that you will provide this fundamental thing, you have taken a giant step towards getting your ex back.


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How To Get Her To Pay For The Date

How To Get Her To Pay For The Date Is Easier Than You Think

There has been a long-standing gender inequality that has persisted throughout the ages. Unlike other gender inequalities, this persistent unspoken rule has plagued individuals while going almost wholly unnoticed. What is this gender inequality?

Men are expected to pay for meals without question. Even worse, they are expected to at least offer up the service. While this may seem like no large deal to some people, consider the peculiarity of the custom. A man, who is expected to treat a woman as rightful equal in all social stratas, is then expected to offer to foot a bill for a meal.

This is tied into two obvious concepts. One is that a woman should be paid for, as it is the gentlemanly thing to do. This flies in the face of the endless push by women’s rights groups to treat women as equals and not as special cases. Secondly, the gesture is meant to indirectly expose a man’s virility by way of his success.

A man who is not willing to pay is a man who cannot pay. A man who cannot pay is an unsuccessful man. Moreover, an unsuccessful man is not as worthy of respect or female attention as a man who is successful. These two stigmas play into the act without question. However, is there a way to turn the tables and avoid this social norm? Is there a way to get the woman to pay for the meal?

Option One: Just Expect it

how to get her to pay
how to get her to pay

Before you go out to dinner try saying, “So, you’re paying, right?” There are two options here for her. She will either be caught off guard and agree to paying without really thinking about it, or more likely, she will ask you to repeat.

The important part here is to not falter. Remember, you are not trying to demand her to pay. You are simply expecting it. Do not begin stammering or backtracking to save face.

Simply look her directly in the eyes and repeat the question. “You are paying, correct.” She may be a bit put off by this at first. Let that be okay. It is up to you whether or not what you said is off-putting.

If she truly has a problem with it, talk about it after the meal, not beforehand. It cannot be stressed enough that you are not attempting to force here to pay. There is no purposefully forgetting your wallet or leaving your money at home.

You should have your money with you and be capable of paying if need be. Instead, you are simply expecting that it is a viable option that she pays. That is because it should be a viable option. There is no clause that states men MUST pay for a woman’s meal. For men to expect particular things from women is considered rude, and so for women to expect something from men is also just as rude.

Option Two: Give Her The Opportunity

Giving the women the opportunity to pay is just as effective as asking her if she will pay. When the waiter is about to bring the check, excuse yourself to the restroom. When he or she brings the check, it will be placed in the center of the table.

This causes the woman to have to face the check herself. For many individuals there is a natural inclination to consider picking up the check. Unfortunately, sometimes the waiter will drop the check right in front of your open chair. This will ruin such a plan.

So, you can also wait for the waiter to come by with the check. You can then direct him or her to place the check at the center of the table, then excusing yourself to the bathroom. The usual amount of time that is worth waiting for is 4-7 minutes maximum.

The woman must have enough time to begin to let her mind wander, and thus more likely wander toward the check. This option is a bit conniving, but can work just as effectively as the first. It also is less abrasive and thus less likely to cause conflict. However, it can also be seen as a bit passive aggressive and thus can cause a bit of annoyance.

If Neither Option Works

There is a simple third option that is much more useful. Simply ask the woman her policies on payment of meals. There is no harm in asking a woman what her policy is on the situation. Be frank and upfront with her and she will likely be the same back. Instead of these mind games, simply explain to her you are interested in knowing and lay out your reasons why. There is a good chance she will be okay with paying now and then. Want more tips? Join our community of relationship advice givers and seekers


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Men And Rejection – We Hate It!

Men and Rejection

I don’t mean hate in the sense of “I hate broccoli” or “I hate the lakers”, no, I mean hate to the extent that most men would rather fall ill then get rejected by a woman.

Yes, most men would rather trade in good health than to experience rejection. Seems crazy but boy is it true.

I personally remember my days as a youth when I would spend hours psyching myself up to go talk to a girl I liked but right before I would go talk to her something strange would always happen…

My vision would become blurry, the stride of my walk would lose its swagger, I would get nervous sweats and my mind would start to play a series of mental videos showing all the of possible outcomes of my approaching her… getting a slap on the face, being pushed away, getting verbally insulted & my personal favorite, getting kneed in the groin.

And before I knew it I had successfully managed to de-psych myself moments away from talking to the girl and the only thing left to do was to chicken out and walk away.

Sound familiar?

Because most men (And I do mean like 99% of men) hate rejection we usually and constantly follow this series of steps everyday.

Whereby we would rather let opportunity pass us by then risk success.

So why do we do this?

Simply because we try to appease the fear of rejection. We hate the mental and physical state we experience as we approach a beautiful woman so we reason out to ourselves that we did the right thing by not talking to her. This is where more confidence is needed.

We console ourselves by saying: “I did the right thing by not approaching her. My body and mind are no longer emotionally charged. I’m back in control of myself. Besides I avoided the possibility of getting rejected.”

Now this is the kind of rubbish I kept telling myself for many years… the same kind of rubbish that many men still say to themselves today.

Because the truth is that majority of the time when you actually approach women they are very nice about it. Very rarely will it end with a slap on your face or a verbal assault.

In the first 15 -30s, it will be clear whether she is interested in you or not. And if she isn’t you’ll probably get a “I have a boyfriend” or “Sorry, no thanks.” or “I’m busy”.

But in our minds we are expecting the woman to be bitchy and make you feel stupid for approaching her. And that’s the fear of rejection that you need to overcome because actual rejection as we have seen isn’t all that bad.

Heck, practically speaking once you get rejected you are no better off or worse than you were before you approached her.

If you were single before you are still single now.

If you were in a relationship before… well shame on you for trying to cheat!

But I digress…

So the lesson to be learnt here is that you should never let the fear of rejection stop you from approaching and talking to a girl you like. Because the reality of rejection is that it isn’t bad at all.

Once you learn to accept this as a fact, rejection becomes as insignificant as a speck of dust on your shoulder…

Dust it off and go in with your life!


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Dating Advice For Men, “Why Doesn’t She Call?”

Dating Advice For Men, 4 Tips to Avoid Headache Of “Why Doesn’t She Call?’

So you go out on a date with a lovely woman and you feel like you hit it off well. You give her your number and then return home, almost immediately waiting in anticipation for her to call. Perhaps you met a nice girl at a social even or a bar. After hitting it off you give her your number, you waited for her call so you can meet again.

It is important to remember that in any scenario where someone is not calling you back, that the person may simply be busy. Everyone has their own life, chores, errands, and busy-work to do throughout their day. As much as we would love to be the center of everyone’s attention, sometimes people are too busy to call. It is not out of the realm of possibility that she may forget in the midst of her busy schedule, and so it may take some time for her to remember to call you. Above all, remain realistic about the hope of her calling. Sometimes people will simply not call back, and there is no point in beating yourself up about it.

While awaiting her call hours seem like days and days appear to become weeks and you start to feel as if you may never hear from her. Who among us has not been in this situation? To help anyone struggling through the self-imposed nightmare. Here are a couple items to consider when to avoid the nerve-racking situation.

Tip 1: Have a Proactive Plan

Instead of simply giving your number to her and hoping she calls, try to exchange numbers and let her know that you will call her. Asking her for her number is an easy way to avoid the torment of awaiting her call. If you use this tactic, it is still best to wait two-to-three days before you call to see if she decides to call you.

Avoid calling her too soon. If you must leave a message, inform her that YOU will call back in a couple of days and leave your number in case she lost it. If this tactic fails more than twice, it is best to move on.

Tip 2: Remember to Stay Realistic

If you were unable to obtain her number and she has not been calling back, she could be busy. Perhaps she has not called because it is her workweek. She could have fallen ill, or had packed her schedule before meeting with you.

There is always the possibility that she is out of town or dealing with a personal or family issue. Any reasons could be keeping her from calling. One thing that it is important not to do is to dwell on a self-deprecating thought experiment wherein you create 101 reasons why she does not like you. Remaining optimistic for the first week not only makes it easier on you, but also helps you sound upbeat when she does call.

Tip 3: Do not Panic if the Worst Occurs

If she simply does not call, remember to not to blow it out of proportion. Sometimes people simply do not call back. It may not be any issue other than they just did not have time or interest at that moment.

It is nothing to take personal and with over seven billion people in the world, it is hardly worth losing one’s cool over. So stay loose, do not panic, and remember that if you are able to gain her number, you have the best possible chance of surviving the dreaded wait.

Tip 4: Distract yourself

When I am stuck in such a position, I look for activities and stimuli that will distract me from wondering why the woman is not calling me. The worst thing you can do is sit around and think about it. What good will stewing on the possibilities do? It will do no good at all.

Avoid anything that allows the mind to wander aimlessly as it will inevitably return to why she has not call or whether or not she will ever call. Therefore, it is never advised to take long, slow strolls in parks, or watch boring Television shows that will allow your mind to wander back to wondering.

A smart strategy has always been engaging in a conversation with somebody, or heading out for some physical activity like soccer, basketball, jogging, or anything else that will tire the body and demand concentration the mind.

I often keep the phone away from me as well and allow myself to see it only once an hour at most. This boundary allows me to be forced to engage in the aforementioned activities without distraction and allows time to pass more quickly and without neurotic anguish. I even keep it far enough away that I could not hear it if it rang at all. If I am truly desperate to break the curse of constant wondering I simply turn off the phone altogether.

While there is no way to wholly avoid the self-imposed trial of waiting on someone to call you, it is at least remedied in part by focusing your mind elsewhere and attempting to not allow the situation to control your day and thus your life.

Do you want more dating advice for men?  Check out our section on relationship advice from a man point of view..


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How To Make A Girl Laugh with Humor Women Love

“Humor Is As Important To Women As Chocolate.” How To Make A Girl Laugh?

Now you can’t even count the number of times women have said that they want a man that can make them laugh. Why is this so important to women and how to make a girl laugh?

Because you need to remember that women (especially when over 40) are much more emotional than men and when you are able to make her laugh and smile then her body releases endorphins.

These hormones give her a natural high sensation. The same sensation that she gets from chocolate and you know just how much women love chocolate.

But you need to realize that not all humor is going to be amusing to women and failing to be the right kind of funny could very easily be sabotaging your dating game. You have to know how to make a girl laugh.

Not that no woman wants a clown; not in public and definitely not in private (unless she is into some weird fetish). And that brings up an important question that you must answer:

“What Kind Of Humor Do Women Love?”

Now unless you are a stand-up comedian then you had better avoid trying to be funny by using the generic kind of jokes you would find in joke books or you hear at a comedy show.

Let me explain…

The reason you shouldn’t use those jokes is because of the “Comedian Aspect”. Remember that you don’t want to appear as a clown or a comical entertainer of any sort.

And that is the image that rehearsed jokes will create for you.

Rehearsed jokes only work in a monologue (a stand up routine or comedy show) and not in a dialogue (conversations with women). If you try those jokes in a dialogue you will end up looking starved for attention and a bit of a social clown.

So the kind of humor that you should strive to have is a mixture of witty humor and great self confidence.

The reason that this combination works like gold is simply because having a sense of wit reveals a high level of intelligence whereas it is no secret that all women love confidence in men. Some dating gurus have coined this amazing kind of humor as Cocky Humor.

Witty Humor + Confidence = Cocky Humor

This is key to how to make a girl laugh. Now please note that there is a fine line between cocky humor and plain arrogance. Learning how to tread that line requires some experience but that isn’t hard to acquire.

You will find that the hardest part is allowing yourself to be confident enough to be “Cocky”.

Why?

Because to master and use cocky humor properly, you must have a lot of self confidence.

Let me explain…

When you use cocky humor you will have to be confident enough to be able to tease her while at the same time being charming enough to communicate a playful and good nature behind your bold words.

Cocky humor is playfully good natured & that’s what makes it fun for women. It communicates that you have confidence and intelligent wit and this are both traits you want her to see in you.

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Why do Girls Like Bad Boys

Why do Girls Like Bad Boys?

Have you watched LOST?

Well there is this guy called Sawyer who is the classic bad boy.

You know the guys that you really can’t stand but all the girls secretly love…

He is arrogant, self centered, proud and completely wrong for any gurl BUT they still love him and want to be with him.

So have you ever wondered why all girls love bad boys?

Well I definitely have and for the longest time, the answer remained a complete and utter mystery to me.

I simply decided that girls are emotionally blind to the truth about these fellows or just plain old crazy:-)

But I finally did figure it out…

And the secret to this illogical attraction lies behind the mindset of bad boys and the nature of the interaction they present to ladies. In simple terms, they DARE to talk and treat women in a way that no other man does.

Now like you, most of the lessons that I learnt on how to treat a girl came from mommy.

Think about it weren’t you always told to treat girls “right”, always be polite and nice and never do or say things to make a girl sad or unhappy?…

Sounds familiar right?

Well I lived by that mindset for years and what I eventually realized is that,

“Good Guyz Do Finish Last!”

Bad boys live by a different code, a different mindset when it come to social and intimate interactions with women!

And that mindset is centered on one primary factor: CONFIDENCE.

Most bad boys have a certain unique confidence about them.

They carry themselves in a manner that shows that they are comfortable being who they are and one thing about confidence is this it is usually attractive to women yet repulsive to most men.

Now, if, like most men you are repulsed by the nature of the bad boy, it is probably because of the cold fact that you feel threatened by them… or more specifically you feel threatened by their confidence.

Why?

Because you lack high self-esteem and confidence to be like them.

Sad but true!

Now truly confident and self assured people are able to be indifferent about the attitudes and opinions of others and therefore never feel threatened in social circles.

So what is the result of having “bad boy” confidence?

Well this confidence enables you to be a unique challenge to women.

Let me explain…

Most interactions between a men and women are quite predictable from a woman’s point of view and it usually goes like this:

Man nervously approaches a woman he likes…

He tries to win her over by being super polite and pleasant…

He goes out of his way to get her attention by doing all manner of tasks for her, including treating her to meals and buying her gifts…

In the end, he manages to bore her and can’t understand why since he did everything his mom told him to:)

Now let’s look at this interaction with a bad boy in it:

He confidently walks up to her and says something to start a conversation with her (it could be the corniest line ever but the confidence in his posture, tone of voice and smile is what makes it work)

She likes his confidence and engages him in conversation to test what he has to offer…

He is cocky and funny and doesn’t shy away from teasing her or call her out on crap she may say…

She is surprised at the fact that he is so damn confident to the point that he is even playfully making fun of her even though they have only known each other for no more than five minutes…

In the end, she feels unexplained attraction for this guy she just met and eagerly gives him her # and looks forward to seeing him soon.

So I hope you are beginning to see the importance of confidence to the “bad boy” persona and why women love it so much. And only once you learn to OVERCOME fear and insecurity can you gain self confidence that will attract women to you.

Remember that women like a challenge just like men do and if you are able to create that challenge through your confident nature then that’s perfect.

Now once again, the reason that women love “bad boys” is because they present a unique social and intimate interaction to their lives.

So gain true self confidence and be a bad boy yourself, just note that you can enjoy bad boy confidence without being an ass.


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